But...

The beautiful city of Abakaliki had been extensively hot all day on this stress packed Monday as such, the rain that came in the evening was a welcomed one. Like most Ebonyians who resided in the G.R.A part of Abakiliki, Grace was indoors, though, much more than a storm was needed to cool the heat she felt at the moment. She paced about her room holding her phone in one hand and the Bible in the other, she was deeply in a prayer mood while she occasionally checked her phone for the expected message. "Father Lord! Fight this battle for Tony, no weapon fashioned against us shall prosper, Amen! You are the al..." Her phone beeped and 'new message' displayed on the screen thereby interrupting her prayers. She clicked, scrolled, read and copied out a contact on a rumpled paper that was on her dressing table, then dialled the number, pressed the phone to her left ear and listened to the steady 'burrh... burrh...'. She muttered some prayers softly as she waited to hear a voice from the other end of the connection which came after the sixth ring. "Hello!" A husky voice came through the ear piece of her phone "hello! Hello!! Please am i on to... Inspector Jatau of Madalla police station?" "No Ma" "please sir how do i reach him, it's very urgent" grace said hastily as she began to loose patient "wetin happen?" "Please i need your help, my husband has just been attacked in the house at polosa" "i no de duty abeg, call station na" Grace couldn't hold on any longer, she broke down in tears and replied in shaky voice "please Sir, someone just sent me your number I'm in Ebonyi State at the moment... help my husband because of God" "oya Madam calm down, i will contact station for you, na where the house de?" "No 15, polosa, opposite polosa central Mosque... Oga please help me abeg, i will transfer airtime to you now to enable you keep in touch" she said and sobbed further. "Okay Ma, i will get back to you" The inspector hung up, picked his walkie talkie that was plugged beside his television set, made a distress call to the station, gave out the address, wore a t-shirt, hung his police I D card, carried the key of his motorcycle and dashed out of his house promising his son that he would return pretty soon.

At about 9:16 pm, 13 minutes after Inspector Jatau received the call that dragged him out of his comfort zone, the environs of No 15. Polosa was deserted as the presence of armed Police Officers at such hours of the day called for caution. Some Hausas who usually lurk around that area had ran to the Mosque and could now be seen hanging by the Mosques' window, watching as events unfolded. A police patrol vehicle parked by the road side had only the driver in it who was on standby in case of eventualities. 2 police men mounted at the back of No. 15, 2 others hid at various places over looking the front door of No. 15 while the Officer in Charge of the operation visited house number 14 & 16 to ask questions as regards the possible on-going attack. Mr. Ali of number 14 had confirmed that he heard someone shout not quite long ago while Annabel occupying flat 16 had taken the Officer to her bathroom where they could hear water running from the shower of the next flat which had been on for quite some time now, other than that, nothing seemed wrong. All indications pointed that Anthony of No. 15, Grace's supposed husband, might be in danger, nevertheless,  the Officers had to thread carefully. The O C in plain clothes knocked Anthony's door, got no response, knocked again, went to Annabel's to check if water was still running, signalled his men in hidden positions to get ready, knocked for a third time, still no response, pulled out a pistol and booted the wooden door which shattered in its hinges, it wasn't locked after all.

The time was 9:32 pm now, a lot had gone through Grace's mind, she was hoping to get married to Anthony in 2 months time, how could this be happening to him now? Anthony was a business man who hated banking, he usually kept money at home, this bothered her too. 'If Tony was murdered,  the marriage would be off... If he was only robbed, the marriage would definitely be postponed and this she wasn't comfortable with. What if Tony was crippled or something, can i still marry him?' She thought as tears rolled down her fat cheeks. The Inspector had said he will get back to her and had stopped receiving her calls, she kept wondering what could be happening at the moment and wished she had any of Tony's neighbours contact. She had dragged a friend all the way from Kubwa, almost 20 km from Polosa to help her check what was going on, he was still on transit and hadn't even made half the journey yet. She dialled Tony's number again & received the 'switched off' message yet again, this made her sob further, uncontrollably this time. There are times when even the strongest of men needs a shoulder to lean on, times when one wants to be in the arms of morpheous till a Hercules take control of the situation. Times when you want to delve into the ocean of your past activities and exhume a detailed record of your bad and good deeds then ask which had warranted the current situation, this was that time for Grace. She dabbed her eyes once more and was about dialling any of her recently dialled number when a call from an unknown contact came through.

"Hello!"
"Yea... Hello!... Good evening!"
"Evening Ma! This is detective Musabe, am i on to... Miss Grace Obijiaku?"
"Eh... yes Sir"
"I would need you to report to our station as soon as possible at Madalla for questioning as regards the event that just occurred at No. 15, Polosa"
Grace's heart skipped a beat then resumed,  thumping very fast now
"But... I'm in Ebonyi State at the moment na, what's going on? Is Tony Okay?"
"Ebonyi State?... damn! Then i would have to question you over the phone, i guess. Tell me where exactly you were as at 2247hrs this evening"
"In my hotel room in Abakaliki Sir"
"How did you get to know Mr. Anthony was in danger and why shouldn't i believe that you had a hand in all of this?"
"Me? Look sir, Tony is my fiance, we hope to..."
"Hold it there, you initially told one of my men that Mr. Anthony was your husband right?"
"Ye.. ye... yes na, we.... were supposed to get married soon"
"Hum!"
"Wait first.. sir! Are you insinuating that i kille..."
"Don't be faster than your shadows. To the best of my knowledge, you made the distress call right?"
"Yes Sir"
"I want to know everything that happened,  exactly what you know"
"We were on the phone then all of a sudden something happened that made him yell, i heard a crackling sound,  then the phone went dead, since then i haven't been able to reach him"
"Madam! Does this look like a joke to you? I asked for a detailed explanation and you're feeding me this crap? Do you want me to read out your rights for you and declare you wanted? Are you high?"
"I'm sorry Sir... I called Tony my fiance this evening at about 25 minutes past 8pm when i was sure he would have returned from work. He said he just returned from work and was very hungry, other than 2 packs of noodles, there was nothing to eat in the house. He's a bad cook so i offered to coach him over the phone, all he needed do was use a hands free while i instructed him on what, when and how to do what he ought to do to cook the noodles. He had turned on the gas, sliced the onions and pepper, poured them in the water and we were waiting for the water to boil before i instructed him to put the noodles in it. We gisted about other things as we awaited the water that was already getting hot then he said he was pressed and wanted to use the comfort station. While he was doing that, i was cracking adult jokes on how his urine was sounding as it splattered  in the bowl of the WC when i heard him scream all of a sudden. I heard other sounds before the phone went dead. I tried calling back but the network operator said his number was switched off, till now it's switched off. I guessed he was under attack from probably burglars, so i called various contacts till some one sent me Inspector Jatau's number"
"Hum! Are you sure you are telling me the truth? "
"Yes Sir... I swear... how can i lie with something as serious as this? Officer! Please believe me"
"Madam! Well done! You try well well... Shey you carry Tony cut pepper finish you say make him enter toilet go piss abi? You wan tell me say you forget to tell am say make him wash hand ne? What did Tony do to you to deserve this for God's sake?"

Thought you knew?

5 YEARS BACK

"Who is there?"
"Kopa! Na me, Chuks"
Sani stood up to answer & unbolt the door for Chuks to come in.
"Ah! Aboki na you? Sanamakum"
"see your mouth, na so dem de talk am na him we still de use am?"
Sani replied & they let laughter occupy the atmosphere. Fred switched his focus from the desktop monitor to Chuks.
"Guy ha fa na?"
"I dey o"
"sidon na"
"I de hurry, popcy tell me say you de complain about the sockets for your room, naim ɪ say make ɪ check you"
"that is true, none of them..."
"No worry..." chuks interrupted "...first thing tomorrow morning, I go come run am, i know the problem, I for even do am now, but person de wait me"
"dan iska, na woman abi?"
Sani reacted
"before nko? You think say na aunsa land we de? Here nobody go cut my prick"
Chuks responded chuckling
"na you go cut am with your own hand, shegey kawai"
Sani replied
A smiling Fred added "Abi? Come Chuks you nogo free my home boy for me?"
Then they all burst out laughing. Chuks stamped his bare foot on the ground twice
"omo! Dis una rug make sense o"
Fred who had re switched his attention to the monitor, replied flatly
"na God o"
while Sani just seemed to be lost again in Social Network. Chuks opened the door to take his leave and squatted to wear back his shoes
"Ehen, my Dad talk to you yesterday about cigar abi?"
"Yea..." Fred replied & went on "...he said ɪ can’t have gas around & still smoke cigarettes nearby"
"pardon that old man joor, him no just know how to preach quit smoking for you make you no go take am personal, you know say na Pastor, dana why him tell you that one"
"Shebi you see your life?" Sani said sarcastically
"shut up there my friend, Aboki like you..." chuks fought back & by this time he was done lacing his shoes. "...Guys till tomorrow na"
"okay"
"oya na"
Sani & fred responded in a chorus.
"Use condom o" sani added as he bolted the door after chuks who was already motioning for a commercial motorcycle (okada).

4 MONTHS LATER 

The door leading to the third house of an eight flat apartment opened & a pretty lady walked in. She wriggled her nose once again and looked over the balcony to the ground floor
"so na wetin de smell be..." A sudden movement caught her eye & she saw her Boy friend sneaking to the kitchen window with his right hand behind his back. "...Baby you startled me… & what is that you are hiding?"
"your wedding ring, its suppose to be a surprise you know"
she rushed at him pushing him back away from the window & wrapped her hands around him groping for whatever thing he had behind his back.
"Sweety! Stop this joor, must you see everything?"
"Baby you've been smoking"
"God Forbid"
he tactically brought his hands behind her back without her knowledge & hugged her. She declined the hug.
"Answer me, you've been smoking"
"no I haven't, stop this na"
she retreated trying to break his grip while he followed her with hands still behind her back.
"I hate it when you lie to me, just.. let.. me.. be"
she broke free from his hug & slammed her back on the window protector.
"It’s the cigar you are hiding ba?"
He raised his hands up
"see, my hands are empty"
"it’s a lie, you threw it out the..."

BOOOOOOOOOOOM

The floor shook under their feet as the house rocked a little.
"Jesus!"
both of them cried out as they dived to the kitchen floor. Hanging serving spoons shattered to the floor while used mugs in the wash hand basin rattled at their position. Silence fell in that vicinity for like 20 seconds
"Bomb! Bomb!!"
Someone yelled from a distance, then the whole house resumed its activities, only that this time it was fleeing for safety. Babies started crying, mothers shouting out children’s names, in no time, the stairs was crowded
"Fire! Fire!!"
Someone else screamed. The window by the stairs leading to flat 3 & 4 was covered with smoke that was thickening by seconds. A lady fell down the step & was stampeded, occupants of flat 3 & 4 who couldn't join the struggle for survival at the stairs resort to jumping down from their east wing balcony, of course it was the first floor, while a man & his family at the top floor (7 & 8) thought it wiser to take refuge at the roof top so they escaped through their back door. Other than getting out of the house, nothing else mattered to the residents of no 4A, Ogo Street, Afikpo road, Ebonyi State.

3 HOURS LATER

Residents of Ogo Street gathered in their hundredths at the blast scene ratting while awaiting the arrival of the team who conveyed Mr. Obi to the Hospital. The fire men had taken their leave having put off the fire at flat one while police & other accident response agencies combed the scene to ascertain the explosion. Reporters had arrived in the scene 2 hours ago & everybody interviewed seemed to be accusing Bokoram (A radical religious group that emanated from Northern Nigeria & have been terrorizing Nigerians in the North)
"they kill our people for Hausa land, we no talk, they burn our Churches for there, we still keep quiet, now na to bomb us for our own house? Because we don run leave their place for them?"
One angry man told a reporter.
"Na God go punish Bokoram"
a lady blurted. Just then, 3 Keke napep (tricycles) & an old model Peugeot 504 arrived with passengers all wearing drawn faces, this was the team who conveyed Mr. Obi to FMC Abakaliki.
"They succeeded"
A man said calmly as he alighted from one of the tricycles,
"they have killed Mr. Obi".
Just then a lady from the crowd slumped, uproar sprang, weeping & wailing ignited.
"Bokoram has killed Him for me oh" a woman was crying. At one corner of that vicinity, a smaller crowd was gathering momentum around one angry speaker who was blustering.
"All these aboki men are evil, they are wicked, they have penetrated us because una no fit talk say nobody see person where him think say na him plant this bomb."
Fred, Sani & Helen who hadn't recovered from the shock where approaching this other crowd, just when Chuks took an excuse to speak to the crowd.
"They no penetrate us at all, una no know say one Aboki de stay for the compound?..."
The crowd 'wowed' & 'what?' in amazement. Sani who was just reaching the crowd stopped upon hearing this. Chuks continued"... see the idiot for there"
As the crowds' gaze shifted towards Sani's direction which chuks was pointing, Sani couldn't wait for any further explanation since his legs suddenly only responded to the 'run' stimuli. Bulk of the crowd turned and followed him in pursuit screaming
"Catch am! Catch am! Na Bokoram!" 

2 DAYS LATER

Virtually the whole of Azuiyokwu was a bee hive of activities, Ogo Street with incoming & outgoing viewers of the current blast site, the small market located at its west end had resumed business following its reopening having been shut down a day before due to bomb scare, the State Environmental Board had done a good job of what was left of Mr. Obi's back Yard, while some kids where running through the shattered fence into the compound in the name of play. The police station was not left out of this hullabaloo as angry youths who were gathered at the front of the station, seemed to be passing the same message in a different manner & language. Majority of the crowd spoke in Ibo language while others passed their message in pidgin (broken English). They wanted the police to release Sani who submitted himself to the police for refuge 2 days back whom they believed is in connection with the recent bombing in the state & the police seemed not to be taking appropriate measures. Police officers coupled with some NYSC officials were trying to explain to the angry crowd that the reports from the blasted site didn't come up with any explosive material but this crowd seemed to have done their own autopsy & where so willing to take laws into their hands. Meanwhile, a particular house in Azuiyokwu was rescued from this swarm of activities as Fred pointed a dagger at Helen.
"If I stab you now, just have it in mind that you are the cause, you don't just want to let me think, haba?"
"What is..."
"Shut up!..." He barked, "...Shut up! Must you raise your voice?"
She calmed herself down, threading carefully not to provoke him.
"Sani has been like a brother to you, just tell the police that it was a mistake. Moreover, if you had showed me your hands, I had already perceived & confirmed that there was a leaking cylinder somewhere, ɪ saw two cylinders down stairs."
"Like it’s that easy, a mistake that has cost the life of someone, you expect the judges to treat lightly abi?"
"Is the Nigerian constitution against smoking of Cigar?"
He stood up, went to the curtain & pinched it a little, allowing tiny rays of sunlight penetrate the room as well as checking out for any suspicious movement.
"The landlord had warned me before, what if he asks me to pay for the damages, where do I want to find such amount of money?"
"That should be the least of your worries right now, your own best friend is about to be lynched, don't you get it?"
"My parents would kill me if they hear this"
"fine, let me go, you've kept me here for over 24 hrs now & seized my phone, I'm no longer finding it funny"
"baby I'm sorr..." He held his head like they wanted to burst open "…ɪ can't take that risk, you’re the only one who knows the truth & you don't want to cooperate"
'i would leave here soon' she thought. When He brought her to this old & dusty house at first, she suspected she was being kidnapped because her boy friend was acting very different. She knew it was cigarette butt he threw away through the window before the blast so she immediately excused herself for the restroom upon reaching the house & sent an SMS to her roommate giving her the address of the house & permitting her to take the message to the police station if she didn't return home the previous night. She was very sure the police would be on their way by now, so all she had to do was stall any development and play along till their arrival. Fred paced around for a while, banged his head with his palms like four times, did some mental calculations & was so jumpy. She sight a teardrop in his eye & didn't feel any pity for him, to her, he was evil & had been pretending all along, he felt embarrassed as their eyes locked again & left the room for the next. For some 30 hours when they arrived here, Fred hadn't let Helen off his sight for once so this was like an opportunity as such she made efforts to utilize it. She tiptoed to the door with the hope that it would be locked, nevertheless, it was worth the try. Upon reaching the door, she silently & slowly turned the knob & to her greatest surprise, it was unlocked.
"Come & take your phone before you leave"
Fred called out from the next room. This startled her, for a while she thought it was a trap, but doubted it. This isn't Fred at all, she knew Fred to at least an extent but at this moment, instinct told her there was more to Fred just being in trouble. She no longer thought of her safety but that of Fred. She braced herself up, threw all caution to the wind and headed towards the direction of the voice. Fred was standing behind the door, looking like a ghost in the darker room. His face drawn & he was looking very thin & white.
"Baby what's wrong?"
"Just take your phone & leave, do as you wish"
She discovered the dagger was no longer in sight so she reluctantly ruled out 'suicide' from her thoughts. She was now very alarmed & didn't make any effort to conceal it.
"baby what's wrong with you?"
In a resigned gesture, he muttered
"I will tell them the truth"
"thank Goodne..."
She coughed roughly as he held his nose & sneezed.
"What's hap... tear gas?"
"Jesus Christ!"
They both scrambled to the door, seeking safety as they held their faces down while they choked in the gas.
"Freeze there & put your hands up!"
A mobile police man yelled alongside two other men pointing their big guns at Fred & Helen while three others in oxygen masks proceeded to the house for scrutiny.

1 WEEK LATER

Sani was released & redeployed alongside Fred & Helen to Kaduna, following Helen's police statement that she actually perceived gas when she came to visit both of them, checked through the balcony & saw Late Mr. Obi adding another cylinder to the one outside already & either one or the two seemed to be leaking. She proceeded to Fred's room where she saw Fred & Sani playing TV game joyously like kids who just played their first game for the holidays before the blast. In her other statement, as regards the SMS she sent to her roommate, Helen claimed that she & Fred had agreed to send that SMS because of their safety. According to her, they were afraid that if the crowd couldn't lay their hands on Sani, they might come back & pounce on them being a roommate & friend of Sani. Luckily for Helen, the police didn't retrieve the dagger in the house. The people of Ogo Street saw so many reasons to believe Helen's statement as some neighbors actually attested to the fact that Late Mr. Obi was really a very careless man who on several cases caused minor fire incidents as a result of the same Gas spillage.

Sani casually wondered at Helen's alteration of facts but couldn't bring Himself to ask his best friends in the World questions. He was very grateful & was looking forward to reciprocating these heroic gestures of his friends upon arrival in Kaduna were his Dad, Alhaji Abdulha Kim was the Secretary to the State Governor (SSG).

Helen detested Fred from that day & quit their relationship for a mere act that would prevent Sani from suspecting anything at least for the time being.

Fred! Well... I am finally telling the real story now na, I thought you knew?

Errand boy

Let me tell you a little about Nneka, she's quite a beauty, she sure is, & you will definitely respect me & my choices when you see her. The only issues I've got here is... how do i put this... okay! she's in love with Hamza, who turns out to be my friend. Now before you start hating me, I've got thousands of reasons why she should be in love with me instead of Hamza, i mean... that cheat is a cheat, a liar, he can't be with Nneka & never will be with her. She fell in love with him almost 8 months now, all he does is keep in touch & send her money, that's all, how can he be just a few miles away and would never visit her in campus yet she's all over him instead of me the faithful & caring errand boy? How i hate that attribute. According to a Nigerian artiste, Faze "A woman needs affection...", i helped Nneka sort out her carry overs last semester na. "... Attention...", my schedules becomes irrelevant at her calls. "... protection..." Hamza wasn't there to fix her broken door after she got bugled, i did, i even got her an expensive security door. " ... and love ...", well, she's yet to give me a chance, she's got to give me that chance today in this party, she had better give me that chance.

There was a whirl of multi coloured lights as Olamide's voice threatened to burst through the speakers with his 'lagos boys', everybody in the party seemed to have memorised the lyrics of the song and was embarking on a fruitless mission to out loud the speaker. There was this uniform shoulder dance that had dominated the party hall since the Disk Jockey scratched in the song, whereas pockets of smooch & endearment sessions could be spotted at virtually every corner of the arena. An anxious Joseph holding a half filled glass of 'red wine' sat at the bar, though not drinking, he would sacrifice anything to maintain a conscious state at the moment. Technically, he was watching the dancers doing their thing and enjoying the scene, but in reality, he had his eyes fixed on Nneka and suppressing a boiling rage to pounce on the numskull that has been dancing glued to her bum. The dancer, probably drunk, made yet another attempt to make a grab at her breast when she finally put a halt to his advances with a thunderous slap that wowed the nearby dancers and exited the dance hall for the bar, leaving a sullen drunk rubbing his red right cheek & watching her walk away, Joseph smiled at this development as she approached him.

"Babe! You de vex o"
"That guy is a scumbag, you need to see what he's been trying to do since, for crying out loud, do i look like those type of girls?"
"Definitely not, you sure placed him where he belongs"
"Very stupid guy... are you drinking that?" She pointed at the drink in Joseph's hand. He passed the drink to her as she sat on the stool next to his. He took the bottle and made to pour her more wine.
"May i?"
"No, let me manage this. Has he called you?"
"No, not really, he called you?"
"Tell me the truth, is Hamza a married man?"
"Wow! I should be asking you that na, aren't you closer to him?"
"Joe! I think Hamza is cheating on me" Joseph who had been observing as events unfolded in the party since Nneka left the dance arena, stood up holding Nneka's hands "I think we should leave this place immediately"
"Why?"
He nodded towards the direction where 3 huge men surrounded the guy involved in Nneka's showdown like they were taking orders from him. She didn't hesitate as they both made way out of Billy's joint in a hurry, flagged an Okada which sped away just in time to catch 2 of the huge men force their way out of the crowded entrance of the party venue. 'Lucky us' Joseph thought while Nneka who was sandwiched between Joseph & the Okada rider, couldn't seem to recover from her state of exuberance, "that was awesome" she kept screaming as they were gunning for Nneka's rented one bedroom apartment, not very far from campus.

Twenty minutes later, exactly 15 minutes to 11 pm, Joseph & Nneka were sitted in the living room of Nneka's apartment "You're only angry because Hamza couldn't show up today"
"Couldn't show up today? Will he ever show up? Is this how to treat someone you claim to love? Now he isn't taking his calls, is he a married man? What does he want from me? Why is he doing this to me?"
"I can't tell, you sho..." she interrupted "Why can't you tell, isn't he your friend? Do you know what? Finish your meal and leave me alone, I've had enough for one night, moreover, it's getting late, my landlord don't like his gates opened till late"
"Fine, let me tell you the truth, Hamza is not only a married man, but a cheat as well, i didn't want to come in between you gu..." there was an attempt to open Nneka's locked door to no avail, Joseph stiffened while Nneka relaxed as she heard keys dangle & one being inserted in the key hole, a turn, then the door opened. A tall lady on a track suit walked into the well furnished sitting room, holding a basket ball under her arm, she paused to examine Joseph who was sitting on a couch, devouring a plate of rice & stew placed on a stool before him, then said "Hi!" With a slight wave of her left arm. "Hello! & welcome" Joseph replied in a puzzled expression. Nneka who had been whining on the opposite couch said a flat "welcome", picked up a remote controller and changed the startimes channel. The basket baller rolled her ball to a corner of the living room and proceeded to the inner room, switching on the light.
"I didn't know you now have a roommate" Joseph whispered
"She's not my roommate, she's a family friend, who is only visiting"
Silence fell in the house, only the sound emanating from Joseph's spoon as it struck the ceramic plate could be heard. The basket baller came out of the bedroom few minutes later, wrapped in a 'Chicago bulls' designed towel and proceeded to the bathroom, a few feet away. She ran her bath water, came out, and entered the kitchen. Nneka who was no longer comfortable with the atmosphere in the room, broke the silence as the basket baller came out of the kitchen "How was your game?" Ignoring the question, "I can't find my shower cap" "it's in the bathro..." "it's not there" she interrupted and returned to the kitchen. Nneka and Joseph who was just through with his food exchanged glances, then she got up, cleared the empty dishes and headed for the kitchen. Joseph pulled out a serviette from its pack placed on a shelf that rested on the wall, dabbed the corners of his mouth, picked up some crumbs he dropped and followed Nneka almost immediately to the kitchen.

Papa Nkechi collapsed when the Doctor after the blood test revealed that Nkechi whom he had nurtured all these years as his only daughter wasn't related to him biologically, he recovered after few minutes. He would have had a cardiac arrest and died if he found himself in Joseph's shoes, standing at the door of Nneka's kitchen, watching Nneka, the supposed love of his life and the basket baller exchange saliva in a hot french kiss session. "Jesus!" Nneka broke out of the basket baller's grip in a shock "Joseph! What are you doing here?" She asked in a panic while the basket baller frowned "Jesus? What about Him? Excuse me abeg" she left both of them in the kitchen, slightly giving Joseph who was on her way a shoulder and went to the bathroom. Nneka who had recovered from the shock of being caught in the act said "well, now that you've caught me, let me expl..." Joseph, now angry, replied in a harsh tone "don't you dare, don't even try it" now furious, Nneka retorted "Who are you to tell me that? How dare you speak to me like that?" "Why shouldn't i? You cheat, dirty thing, so you're even a lesbian?" "Cheat? On who? You timorous dumb? Look who's calling someone dirty", "no wonder there's no man in your life" "there's a man alright, only that he isn't man enough for me, he doesn't even have the guts to ask me out, he's only an errand boy" Joseph laughed, 'let me finally let the cat out of the bag' he thought. "You see how bli..." she cut him off "Don't even start, you shameless timid fool, how did Hamza really get my Facebook contact? Why did he contact me barely a week after i told you my type of men? How come he fits all my description and coincidentally, he has a friend in my school and that friend is you?  Why does he always seem to say the right things and do things the way i want it done? Isn't it obvious? Do you think everybody are fools like you? I dial his number, he doesn't receive, but you just spoke to him not quite long ago, you're not even a good actor. You have just one phone contact, yet you walk around with 2 phones, are you that senseless? At the club, i tried to reach him, but smiled each time i dialled his number and see a light shine from your pocket, shame on you Joe, shame on you" The bewildered Joseph with eyes popped out replied in a much lower tone "you mean you knew all these while that Hamza didn't exist and you were only eating my money all along?" "No, i mean you've overstayed your welcome and there's the door"

Story of the gods

They came out slowly and steady with eyes popped out, at this moment, i knew the gods had arrived. The two at the front were holding bamboos, much thinner than the likes in our forest and pointed it at us, swinging it from one direction to the other, pointing it even to guards hanging on tree branches and too astonished to conceal themselves any longer. Some guards who couldn't resist the urge to wait for the blessings from these gods, threw all caution to the wind and made mad rush at the gods. The three gods without bamboos ran back to the floating house while the remaining two with the bamboos, blessed the approaching guards in a loud bang who fell to the ground, smoke meandered it's way through the tip of their bamboo, what a blessing for these two. Other guards ran towards the gods as more blessings came out in loud bangs, more guards fell and i heard the Oba shouting that he should be dropped, he wasn't going to miss these blessings for the world. I came out of my hiding too and was about going to receive mine when my dad grabbed me and drew me back. I heard him shouting to the Oba and every other guard to stop and raise their hand, he shouted that these guards are getting killed not otherwise. Explaining further that these are creatures like us and are only defending themselves by killing those who they presume is coming to attack them, he faced the gods with his hands up and he wasn't blessed like the rest, one of the gods raised his left hands too while the right still held a bamboo pointing at us, that is when my people for the first time, listened to Ozinomeme.

You go see...

"I hate this woman" Ikenna said while Osasu who had been leaning on the corridor rail turned towards the opposite direction to face the door leading to Mrs. Onu's office "you don see who like her before?" he hissed and made a face. A corp member came towards them and paused, looked at the door first then to Ikenna and Osasu "I hail o... abeg Mummy de?" Osasu walked away down the corridor leaving Ikenna to attend to the stranger. Ikenna pointed to a vehicle that was about to leave the premise "look... see her there, na she de inside that motor, them say they wan reach stadium, if you get bike, you fit reach before them sef" The stranger thanked Ikenna and hurried towards the gate of the NYSC secretariat in time to catch only the tail light of the vehicle as it made a left turn and sped away. Osasu returned to the spot he left Ikenna "Mummy's keeper... my mind de tell me wetin you just do" "no mind..." Mrs. Onu's door opened suddenly and a well kitted Youth corp member appeared from the Office and beckoned Osasu and Ikenna away from the office door. Ikenna asked in an anxious note as they walked down the corridor "Presido! How far?" "Guy! Forget o, that winsh no gree, she say una must go sweep and today is the last day" Ikenna suddenly blurted out "Sweep fire! Punish her Papa... Shey na wetin FG say maa kon do for Abakaliki abi?" Osasu hissed and held Ikenna's hand "guy make we clear joor, forget her, we go change CDS" "na by change CDS? if she no clear you for this month, no alawee for you be that and you're likely to get an extension" Paul said apologetically. Ikenna frowned "do i look like i care? NYSC should add our money to her salary na... I can't go and be sweeping market all in the name of CDS, what rubbish!" Osasu who was still holding Ikenna's hand added " I no blame her, if to say she don get pikin, she for know how to treat other people children well". A door suddenly opened 2 offices away and a young woman in her late thirties came out of her office, clutching a Louis Vuitton hand bag under her arm. Her light skin from excessive bleaching glittered in her black fitted suit jacket which blanketed a plain white turtle neck tee shirt. The over loaded pencil jeans went slightly bowed below and got tucked in an above-ankle black leather Peter Ascot's cow boy boots. Save for the simple wedding ring on a finger of her left hand, no one would have believed this pretty lady was a 'Mrs. Somebody'. Mrs. Onu looked right up the corridor and further left down then paused for a while upon sighting the Trio youth corp members of Ikenna, Osasu and Paul. She shook her head in pity, locked her office door and took her time in fishing out her Hugo boss glasses case from couple of items in her bag. She flung her flowing hair backwards and carefully screened her eyes with the sun shades before walking away graciously, swaying her massive hips in a gentle tide, leaving Paul lusting after this epitome of sensuality while Ikenna and Osas looked in disgust. A Youth corp member who had just alighted from an Okada outside the secretariat gate hurried towards Mrs. Onu and prostrated a little in greeting having met her at the entrance of the long corridor of one of the several blocks of the premises. Mrs. Onu seemed not to be in a hurry as she paused in a photographic pose to listen to the Corp member, she was fully aware of the attention she had generated and was enjoying the stares.

Emeka George

It was another sunday morning in the same Church, the same Pastor & only few changes in the faces of the Church members, Emeka was sitted at the same corner of the Church which he sat 8 months back. The only notable difference was; instead of sitting amongst his peer group like way back, he was sandwiched amongst his family members, few neighbours and other well wishers. This group wore bubbly faces and were so anxious to incorporate the rest of the world into their galaxy of felicitation. To Mrs. Chinwe, the Pastor was taking ages to drop the bombshell while Emeka kept his mind focused on his 3 staged moves. His elder sister who was sitted next to him gave him a nudge and deported him from his fantasy back to the Church
"nna ke buno?"
"Aunty biko apumaka"
Emeka replied in a blush while she chuckled at the little boy who just couldn't conceal his feelings at this moment, he was like a room with opened windows without curtains.

At about 15 minutes later, the Pastor finally made the long awaited announcement and the drama that followed was such that wouldn't be forgotten in a hurry by whosoever witnessed it. The Georges' immediately plunged into a jubilee trance as they subconsciously covered the distance between their role and the altar while Emeka unleashed his stage one moves. His elder sister however remained with the neighbours and other well wishers, safe guarding the bag of rice, cartons of Juice and can drinks that the Georges' came with. The rest of the Church members sang songs of praises with the choir group as they waited for Emeka and his entourage to register their readiness at the altar which would terminate the keyboard players before the commencement of the testimony. Emeka who was the core of this drama was enjoying himself, swaying to all directions, shuffling his feet alongside the rhythm and came to a halt at the altar with a creep walk as the drummers rolled their drums to a stop. The microphone was handed over to Mr. George who held hands with his wife while their 3 male children and 2 nieces surrounded them at the altar.

"Praaaaaaaaaise the living God!"
"Hallelujah!"
responded the Church and this repeated itself before he continued
"As most of you already know, my name is Mr. George and this is my lovely wife, Mrs. Chinwe George"
The old man in his late 60s announced and coughed roughly, thanks to his dry throat that had suffered intense nicotine injection.
"The Lord is good, all the time. There have said that admission is hard in this country and many people did not go to school again beca... gbehe!... gbehe!...."
He beat his chest hard and cleared his throat again while Mrs. Chinwe parted her husband lightly at the back. He paused for a while then continued
"I remember that day when Pastor prayed for my son and his friends before the exam, i just look at it like na usual, my son tell me that people have write jamb plenty times and still no get school, so i tell him to write next year again because his result no good. But you see? Amen? Amen! God saw the suffering old man that i am, and bless my family. That the same bad result did not only give him school now, it also give him University inside Abuja which he did not apply for"
A lady from the congregation stretched a 'praise the Lord' which triggered a thunderous 'hallelujah' before they allowed Mr. George forge ahead.
"The Lord tell us in Jeremiah 29:12, i will listen to you, he has listen to us and i know that my Lord will watch over this boy inside the University because he say so in Psalm 32:8"
Immediately, the choir group ignited another series of praise songs while Emeka activated his stage 2 moves as a good number of the congregation stood up from their sits and followed the Church's rhythm by clapping hands.

With the testimony by this Old man of his son who failed the Joint Admission and Matriculation Board (JAMB) examinations and yet secured admission in the university, 10am service in the Pentecostal church located at Nubia Street, Afikpo road, Enugu, crawled to a close and by 12:10pm, a lot of her members could be seen with little hampers of Juice and can drinks under the scorching November sun, trying to get away from the Church premises.

My Eko story

"Madam enter motor make we go na" "you no o kon open boot maa put load?" "Madam abeg enter with the bag" "driver! ahn ahn! e go better make she put am for..." "enter if you de enter jorey or your pikin go come down maa comot for here" "wait first... wetin de the boot were you no wan open?" "yes! why you no wan open the boot sef" "Small boy oya kon down, go meet your mama" The driver by the wheels of the Toyota Carina E wagon stretched an arm behind and opened the rear passengers door by the right. As the little boy who was already sitted made to get off the vehicle to meet his waiting mum, a passenger who was sitting beside the driver switched off the vehicle, removed the car key and got out of the car as well. "you must show us wetin de that boot were you no want make they open" "oga abeg na, give me my key, i de hurry" just then the rest of the passengers alighted from the vehicle and joined the first passenger "yes! wetin de that boot sef?" "na so una go de carry bomb waka" "kon open am make we see" "Bros abeg, na ice block de my boot" "kon open am make we see joor" the driver now alarmed at the possible crowd these passengers were likely to pull decided to justify their curiosity. He opened the boot from the inside and alighted from his vehicle, wearing a sad look. 2 more passerby had added to the actors of this scenario while the youngest amongst the passengers who was probably going to work for the night shift produced a flash light from his bag. The half a dozen crowd became alert in case of a possible pursuit of the driver and relaxed when the driver lifted the opened trunk of the vehicle. 8 large bars of Iced water laid in the trunk, occupying virtually every available space there was, living everyone disappointed. He gave the passenger who started the hullabaloo a long look of disdain and snatched his car keys from the clutch of a relaxed hand, walked tall to the opened drivers door and colapsed in the sit. He heaved a heavy sigh of relief, started the car and drove away, abandoning the passengers who had boarded the vehicle from Oshodi without demanding a dime for fare. 

'so.... na so these people for mend me?.... inside Eko?.... well, i no blame them sha, na boko haram cause am' Saheed thought as he drove off. He heard a noise behind his vehicle as he galloped over a pot hole. He turned and discovered he hadn't shut his trunk properly so he drove to a kerb close to a waiting passenger and parked. He got off the vehicle, went behind and slammed the trunk shut. As he was about to proceed, the waiting passenger asked "where?" "bariga... You de go?" Saheed entered his vehicle and threw the front passenger's door open. The passenger closed the front door, entered the vehicle through the rear and settled his bulk. "What a day! Thank God you drove by, can you imagine since when I've been standing there?" Saheed just drove off without a reply. Absolute silent fell in the vehicle, the passenger examined the vehicle in a quick glance, noticed 2 stickers of Living faith Church on the dashboard and grinned, he checked the time on his wristwatch and reacted in awe "Ah! I'm even late for service..." He brought out a mobile phone from his breast pocket, tapped and slid on the screen and pressed the phone to his right ear. ".... Bayo.... Bayo! Where are you?... Okay, have your sales reached 10k?... Seven?.... Okay... I'm approaching you now, I'm in a cab, Just come out with the money, I will collect it at the gate, Please hurry.... busy? are you the only one on duty?..... What! I'm sacking those stupid girls today, no more queries. Get 200 Naira ready before i get there, I'm almost at the.... no change? Okay... I'm coming" The passenger hung up and started muttering words not audible to the driver. Saheed had drove through Gbagada phase 2 and entered Bariga from the west, escaping the traffic jam at Bariga junction because of the market. He was about to ask the passenger where he intended to alight and inform him that he wasn't driving beyond the restaurant and bar 2 blocks away when the passenger said "stop me here please". The passenger made a move to open the door "Oga you never gimi money o" said Saheed "Oh! Sorry, Let me get the fare from my boy in the bar, its two hundred Naira na abi?" "Na so, oya na" The passenger alighted, took 3 steps away towards the entrance of the restaurant, stopped suddenly and made a U turn to the cab "please give me eight hundred Naira, i will send my boy with a thousand Naira now" Saheed thought for a while, opened his pidgeon hole, retrieved 3 rumpled one hundred Naira note, took out his wallet, produced a 500 Naira note, added it to the lot and handed it over to his passenger who pocketed the money and entered the premises of the very busy restaurant and bar. Saheed beckoned at the guard stationed at the entrance who advanced to Saheed in long strides "bros! you get?" "ehn! maa follow back drop am... abeg ehn, no let that man were enter now now comot..... and.... help me tell Egbon Tunde make him kon help me for back abeg" "no lele na" Saheed turned right and drove through a rough path towards the small gate behind the restaurant and bar and killed the engine. He took out a bunch of keys, opened the big padlock on the gate, flung the gate opened and stiffened at what greeted him. 

"Ah! Bros!" "Oga!" "ehn... well done o.... i been say maa piss, that's why i de try open the gate" "see the toilet there, you don pass am" The fat man with a bottle of 'star' underarm that had wowed Saheed further squeezed the shirt he had made into a ball and shuffled his feet, not knowing what to do next. "Ehm.. but shey de no de lock this gate before na?" Saheed who had recovered from the shock of finding this fat man trying to open the gate from inside frowned "You don collect the money from your boy were de run my bar?" "Ah! Ba bao! me no know say na you get this place na" "you pay for that bottle so?" The fat man smiled and began to chuckle "Ba bao! You na bad guy, you just lo....." "Gimi my eight hundred Naira first of all" The fat man still smiling inserted his hands into his pocket and produced the exact money he had collected from Saheed earlier on. Tunde joined them few minutes later, studied the scene for a while and asked Saheed in Yoruba dialect. "Egbon! Shey Ole ni eleyi?" "Fi le... Ore mi ni.... Abeg help me off load those ice, lock the gate when you finish, bring the key for me... bros! Follow me" He held the fat man by the wrist and took him to a small dirty room that served as food store and a locker room. Saheed sat on a bag of rice smiling while the fat man whose face had lost all it's glamour stood there wondering what's going to happen to him. "Shey ogbo Yoruba?" "I no understand" "your name?" "Nnamdi.... See Egbon! abeg no vex, actu...." "who tell you make you talk?... trying to Job a gee man na the last thing were you for think of for this life...... First of all, gimi your phone......" Nnamdi reluctantly handed over the phone. "...... pull your shoe, take this slippers make you fold your trouser" "bros abe...." "Shut up! na you go pound all the yams this night then by 3am when we de close, i go help your ministry with half of the money were you been wan steal from me, no complain, shey you get me? abi i no try?" "Ah! Bros! Na da one? we de together na.... how about this fine boy?" Nanmdi asked caressing the bottle of 'Star' he was clutching now. "Gimi something joor, you de craze... I go lock back door, just join those women for kitchen, i de go tell them about you now.... maa no catch your leg for front door o... ehen!... oya comot, your things de hear and i de lock this door too... We go see by 2" Saheed left, leaving Nnamdi with mouth agape, wearing a wry smile. 'i love this guy' he thought.