Jan Wiya

Ecclesiastes 3:1-2

"1: To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the Heaven. 2: A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;".

Just like Prophet Noah (AS) was asked to bring aboard a pair of each animals, so as every coin has two sides.

The 5 years old metal bar which looked like it had stood the test of time as a result of lack of proper maintenance, wasn't left out of this 2 sides syndrome; while one side contained a long dirty corridor with a wall yellow painted wall, hovered by a brownish white ceiling fitted with 3 bulbs in a straight file, 6 metres from each other, the other side held 3 cells of 8 feet each, with holes drilled at a corner which served as a comfort station, a mat, bucket and a keg for water in each cells. Mr. Andrew Adaka sat on a mat in the currently only occupied cell of Magongo Police station in Kogi State, singing 'redemption song' by Bob Marley. 13 minutes had passed the 23rd hour of the day and the police station seemed deserted, this made Mr. Adaka's voice a little louder. "My friend! You no go shut up?" one amongst the only 2 police men that reported and remained in the station for the night duty appeared from a door at the beginning of the corridor, with a 2 weeks old newspaper, marching towards Mr. Adaka's cell. "Sorry sir!" Mr. Adaka returned and stiffled a laugh "you de craze? Why you de laugh like fool since when you come here?" "no vex sir, I'm sorry" he replied and turned his face to the opposite direction. The police constable looked at the newspaper he was holding, indicated a photo with a finger and jammed the paper to the bar, "you know this man?" Mr. Adaka stood up half way from his sitting position to get a clearer look at the photo and returned almost immediately, replying "nope" flatly. "Wetin be your name?" "Jan wiya" "I mean your real name... in full" Mr. Adaka replied "red neck" and smiled, this seemed to infuriate the Police constable, "you de mad? You think say na play I de play for here?..." the police constable walked away and returned 2 minutes later with a slightly heavy bucket, flung the contents of the bucket through the bar on Mr. Adaka and continued "... I say wetin be your name?" the wet man who had tried to dodge the incoming water but to no avail frowned at this development and replied in an angry tone "I want to see my lawyer" "God punish your Papa and the lawyer, I go kill you here and nothing go happen if you no answer me today" "I said I want to see my lawyer" "You still get mouth to talk abi? make i..." "Simon! Simon!! ... " the police corporal on duty who had just emerged from the door of the entrance to the corridor called out "... that's enough... stand down" "see this stupid..." "I said stand down! constable" Constable Simon hissed and walked away from the corridor, bucket in hand, leaving behind the soaked newspaper which had contributed to the mess. The Corporal walked down the corridor to the last room that's usually used as a locker room, fetched a small towel from a heap of clothes, flapped it twice to reduce the dust concealed in it, left the room and proceeded to Mr. Adaka's cell. "Sorry about that Sir... here you go" He passed the towel through the bar to Mr. Adaka who just accepted and smiled without uttering any word. "You seem to be glad you're here... it's like you don't talk very much.... well... I'm sorry about what my colleague did to you...." the Corporal went on a squat position and picked up the wet newspaper which began to drip out water and continued. ".... we've been arguing since you arrived here, I told them the man in the paper was you but no one seemed to believe... your lawyer would be arriving tomorrow morning, I contacted him personally... well... I don't have any clothes here, you can keep the towel sha... call out if you need anything" The corporal rose from his squat position and turned to take his leave "you're a good man" Mr. Adaka replied as he unbuttoned his shirt to dry his body with the towel. It was the Corporal's turn to keep mute though he paused for a while then kept on. "You were right, I am the one in the photo" the Corporal turned and smiled "hum! Can I ask anoth..." "no need, I will tell you why I'm not making a fuss about being here... but before I start, can you get junks for me? I'm hungry, I couldn't eat that thing you guys served me"

"My name is Andrew Adaka, Regional manager of Geerian Bank, that is North Central Region and my family stays here in Magongo while I travel round, you know bank job things na. I spent last weekend with my family and was leaving the house on Monday morning when I was greeted with the shock of my life..." He paused and munched the bread which was on his right hand and disolved it for easy swallow with the Pepsi which he held on his left. He nodded his head, smiling with a mouth full while he chewed hungrily. He seemed to be enjoying the mixture of the meal with the story he was telling so he continued without waiting to swallow up. He started in a babble-like tone which subsided as his throat went into action " I want you to get something straight, do you know Habis Foundation?" "uhhhhhhm No" "well, find out when you can, I'm a proud member. I am the last child and only son of my parents, and was well catered for. My parents were always there for me, my sisters always had my back, my dad was a school teacher, I never for once saw him caned anyone, he scolded my sisters but never laid a finger on any of them, I remember he used to say... 'no one in his right sense would hurt a woman', 'The World shakes when a woman cries and if it's because of you, every living thing goes against you'... my dad once caused the expulsion of a student, a prefect for that matter for slapping a lady, that's exactly what I grew up to live with. May his Soul rest in perfect peace because this training was the best thing that ever happened to me. I became a feminist and made sure I was a member of every serious association, movement or organisation, championing the cause of the right treatment to women. I ignited the abolishment of female bank DSAs and employed the once with my bank and in my region" he bit another piece of the bread, drank more Pepsi, and threw the last piece into his mouth. He paused, swallowed, drank a little more Pepsi, raised the bottle to ascertain the current level, belged a little, covering his mouth with his right hand and dropped the bottle beside his left leg. The patient corporal who stood at the other side of the metal bar leaned on the wall to ease his tiring legs. "On Monday morning, as I was driving to work, I saw a little gathering of people close to that government primary school, along ikpa road, it's not far from my house. It looked like a thief was nabbed and apprehended and they were heading to the police station, but when I drove passed the angry crowd, I discovered that a girl of not more than 14 years of age had been blanketed with the crowd as I sighted the idiot that held her by her trousers, slapping her while one woman who was walking with the crowd supported the lynching with heavy knocks on this lady's head, for what possible reason?" "Innalilahi wa Innalilahi rajiun" "oh! Are you a Muslim?" "yes I am..." "but... you don't look like an aboki na" The corporal chuckled, "I'm from Enugu though" "wow! Ibo Muslim? I've never met one, nice to have met you, interesting... but does your religion support maltreatment of women?" "to the best of my knowledge, no... there's even a complete verse of the Holy Qur'an that was dedicated to women" "yea... I thought as much, the founder of Habis Foundation is a Muslim too and she has admonished us on this on several occasions" "that's nice... well...?" "well... I parked my car immediately, scrambled out and encountered this angry mob, you won't believe the crime they said she committed" "and what could that be?" "She was staying with her Aunt as house help, she did something wrong at home on Saturday and escaped as her Aunt wanted to flog her with a cain, they waited for her till evening before they decided to go in search of this small girl. The whole neighbours didn't rest through out the Sunday while searching for this girl until after a tip off, they found her on Monday morning in one uncompleted building were touts do smoke marijuana. That was all fa... I told them it wasn't worth what they've subjected her to and the lynching must stop, the stupid boy that was dragging her by the trousers who I later discovered was her Aunt's brother in-law, handed this small girl to the woman I told you was knocking the girl who happened to be the said Aunt and faced me. Lo and behold, I received the beating of my life on Monday. Nevertheless, I didn't give up after the first round of my beating, I tried to break the girl free and run away with her but it was 2 against this wicked people, they took turns in driving home that part that I should have minded my business. My clothes were tattered to pieces, it's like they didn't know I parked a car if not, I wonder what would have happened next. Its a wonder they beat me up and let me go, but it was the greatest mistake they made. I got in my vehicle, and sped home... hehehehe! my wife nearly ran away when she saw me emerged from the car.... what a day" the Corporal made his eye brow to a furrow, "I don't get, is that all?" "yea... that was what happened na" "ahn! ahn!! What now brought you here?" "shoo! That was what happened that made me take a dagger from my house, returned to the scene and stabbed the stupid idiot to death, thank God I did it just as some police officers arrived, hahaha... maybe they would have giving me jungle justice" he winked "God! just like that, in cold blood? And no regrets? You could get a life for this, hope you know?" Mr. Andrew Adaka laughed out very loud, mistakingly spilling the rest of the Pepsi that was beside his legs "I don't regret this fa,let the law have its way, at whatever lenght, what's done is been done,no better punishment would have been metted on that fool for maltreating a Priceless Treasure...

Turn around

"Hello!" "Hello Bros! Good Morning!" "Morning! Micheal abi?" "Yes bros" "How are you?" "Fine Bros" "what's wrong with your phone? I was trying to reach you yesterday" "bros! They don steal the phone o, in short na why I call you be that" "what! How come na?" "Bros! I beg I fuck up, bros! I beg forgive me, I kno..." "Wait first... That porsche abi?" "Bros I swear I no even know wetin control me yesterday" "my goodness! Micheal you have killed me... Micheal you mean... In short you're a disgrace, at age 29 Micheal you think you're still a kid abi? You know what? Just make sure when I reach house on Friday I go see that phone, I de go deliver am on Saturday morning, any other of your story na your business" the other end of the connection suddenly went dead before Mike could say a thing. He looked up to the opened toilet windows above him, 'I doubt if anyone heard this conversation' he thought. A lizard landed on the floor from the fence & nodded, he suddenly envied the lizard, no reputation to guard, no fears or worries, no troubles to face, just free. He felt exhausted and sat down on a concrete slab protruding from the wall of the house which roofed the ground floor soak-away. Another lizard suddenly materialised from a nearby shrub and engaged the lizard in a hot pursuit, 'the lizard wasn't that free after all' he thought. He scratched the back of his head, glanced at his wrist watch, vitamin D was still up for grab so there wasn't any need returning to the house, he wanted to be left alone to think so he leaned on the wall, hung his legs on the fence in a scissors and reactivated his worry mode. His elder brother Jimmy wasn't the type that made a fuss. Unlike Micheal, he never showed off, always busy trying to make more money & was very contended with his possessions. Jimmy Kassar was the first of two children of Late Mr. & Mrs. Fanen Kassar who died 17 & 12 years back respectively. Jimmy had always blamed himself for the death of his father even though his mother credited it to Mr. Fanen's pride. When Jimmy was 18 & had rounded up his SSCE, there was a night party organised for his set, a final year party for only the graduating students of FGC Malali, Kaduna which was to hold after the last WAEC Paper for the year. For security reasons, a hall in Police College Kaduna was proposed as the venue for the party while Mr. Fanen Kassar, for principles influenced by religion, forbade Jimmy from attending. Jimmy had made his father see reasons to why he must attend the party but to no avail since Mr. Fanen stood firm to his grounds. Jimmy made up his mind & sneaked out of the house at Station quarters, Kaduna, which was roughly 5km from the venue at about 11pm when his parents had retired to bed leaving little Micheal Fanen to lock the back door behind him. It was a swell party & made Jimmy discard every atom of regret for breaking his father's rules 'anything were wan happen, make e happen' he thought as he returned home in the wee hours of the morning. Mr. Fanen's big Ego was wounded upon discovering Jimmy had not obeyed his words. Irrational decisions were taken, wrong moves were made & a show of shame displayed publicly as father went way out of line to reign supremacy over son. Despite cries & pleas from family & neighbours, Mr. Fanen disowned Jimmy in his very own words, banned him from answering his name for a surname & sent the boy parking out of his house. The beg for forgiveness continued for weeks to no avail as Mr. Fanen's Ego didn't allow him go back on the decision. This disturb Mr. Fanen though, Jimmy had reacted as well during a verbal fight between father & son, "I pray this your pride doesn't kill you someday"... In another development, Jimmy also said "its your pride that made you fix your name for our surname instead of grandpa's name" these words had hit Mr. Fanen hard & he wished he never took it this far. Mr. Fanen had HBP which resulted to a Cardiac Arrest & four weeks after his brawl with his son, the 16 months retired Nigeria Railway Service officer, the ever galant pensioner kicked the bucket. Jimmy relocated to an Uncle's at Sabon Wuse in Niger State while Micheal & His Mother relocated to Mr. Fanen's poor father's house in Igbor, Gboko, Benue State. Micheal was practically a burden to his mother & paternal grand parents because his smallish physique didn't allow him work in the farm, hunt or go fishing. He was definitely younger than his age & couldn't compete with his peer group for the struggle for survival, the only way he contributed to the family was through the money he earned with his dance during the annual kwagh-hir festival. Nevertheless, Micheal was handsome, outspoken & had a touch of a city boy, which attracted a lot of village girls to him & made him the errand boy of so many village champions who couldn't approach the ladies they desire, this fetched him stipends too. Mrs. Julie F. Kassar died wretched four years later, leaving behind nothing tangible for little Micheal who had now become 16 with only a Primary School Leaving Certificate for academic success. 2 years after the death of his mother, Jimmy had visited the only blood relation he had left in Igbor & upon seeing Micheal's living conditions, made preparations to take Micheal along with him to Abaji in Abuja where he was running his one year compulsory NYSC program. As a Youth Corp member earning a monthly allowance of N9,900 from the Federal Government & N6,000 from Abaji Local Government, with a free accommodation in a secondary school staff quarters situated at a very remote part of Abaji, Jimmy had a fat savings & was capable of catering for the welfare of he & Micheal. He took it upon himself to sponsor Micheal's education to any length if He would drop the Ego & start from JSS 1. Micheal grabbed the opportunity with opened arms, thanks to his deceptive physique, which allowed him process another birth certificate, taking 6 years out of his current age. Micheal successfully rounded up his SSCE & secured admission to study Political Science in University of Abuja while Jimmy on the other hand resorted to self employment, running a Laptop & Phone supply company, located in Abuja, having worked with various private companies. Jimmy resided in Gwagwalada, Abuja because of Micheal, he wanted to be close to his brother to be able to cater for his welfare financially & emotionally and make sure he never lacks or have any cause to revisit history.

Micheal who resided in Jimmy's that seldom stays at home kept a whole lot of secrete from his circle of friends, amongst the lot was his age of which he was thought to be the youngest. Family history was another secrete, everyone believed Micheal came from a wealthy home, born with a silver spoon & owned the house he resided in Gwagwalada. Micheal would put a large framed photo of himself in the living room in Jimmy's absence, wear Jimmy's expensive clothes & shoes & go withdraw imaginary money sent to him from his imaginary wealthy parents. To further cover his secrete, he became reserved, an introvert & deceptive, showed off to impress, attracting loads of campus girls. Maintaining this false high standard made him insert his sim card in the new Blackberry p'9981 porsche designed phone Jimmy had purchased for N350,000 on demand, he had lied to his friends that he bought it & didn't really like the phone as such he was likely to resell it any soon. Now the phone had been stolen, Jimmy is mad at him, his reputation stood on a cliff edge, soon to hit the rocks. "I will not break down, I'm Tiv, I dare not fall my own hand" he said quietly to him self and snapped back to reality. He felt moist on his face, vitamin D had gone on a break to return the following day, the sun threatened to rip off his eye balls, he got up from the slab, stood on his feet, swiped his hands at the back of his trousers severally, took 5 steps from the back to the side of the house, and 15 steps more brought him to the stair case where he began the slow climb to the apartment he occupied with his elder brother, enveloped with the thought of his next line of action. "Mike! Mike!! See this guy, were you de since? Na you I just de find up & down" Emma came rushing up the stairs while Micheal paused at the front door he was about opening before Emma showed up "I been no lost na, why you de find me?" "Inspector Adamu called me since that they've found my car" "what! So fast? Where?" "For kwali, its like them no fit activate the security so the car off for road" Emma smiled, looking very happy & anxious to go to Kwali. Micheal who knew it was useless to have any hope of his phone still being in the car reciprocated the smile and pretended happy "wetin you de wait for? Where's Jacob? Let's go na"

Mrs. Ralia's cold war

My tab's notification tone brought me back to reality so i checked and read the message then hoistered it. I stood up and proceeded to the kitchen to wash my hands, leaving my plate in a mess on the dining table. The kitchen window over looked the side of our house and i could see Ralia as she continued with the laundry, there was something different about her. She wasn't that pathetic Ralia who had retreated to her shell and will only come out when very necessary, she had brightened up, smiling and was even huming a song i couldn't pick as she washed. She looked younger now, i even  discovered she had dimples and this made me frown again. 'What's amusing this fool?' I thought, just then the very loud ringtone from her Nokla mobile phone, a replica of the original Nokia and had managed to stand the test of time added to the Noise pollution in Lagos State. She immediately pressed a key that made the phone hush, looked from left to right without noticing me because i had ducked in the kitchen and she ran towards the backyard. 'What's this stupid thing up to' i asked myself in a thought as i tiptoed to the guest room toilet where i could view the backyard. I heard her speak to the scrap of a phone very happily as she replied the caller "yes Linda, he said that to me, i think he's coming back". I hated myself the more, 'said what?' I thought. Suddenly i realised what my so called sucker punch was: 'of course yes, i love it just the way it is just like i love you just the way you are'.